A mediator is neutral third party. During mediation, it is important that each party feels comfortable expressing themselves and understood by the mediator. For a successful outcome in mediation, the parties must participate in good faith, integrity, and with a willingness to work together.
An important conflict resolution skill and Divorce mediation technique is knowing how to select language that will de-escalate a conflict. Seasoned mediators can help parties by reframing their words and providing words and phrases that work well in negotiation and reaching an agreement while others just make matters worse. Words which inflame, imply a bias, or offend are best avoided. On the other hand, certain phrases tend to have a positive effect. For instance, framing an unresolved issue as “something to be worked on” is more effective than characterizing it as a “dispute.”
A mediator is responsible for balancing the power or helping to even the playing field. Making sure that neither spouse overpowers the other with emotional or financial control is critical in the mediation process. Good mediators can ascertain each person’s underlying interest versus their exterior positions and address that interest while keeping the playing field level. No one wants or likes to be taken advantage of. It’s a mediator’s responsibility to help make sure both parties are being fair and equitable with each other. Having a well-trained, experienced mediator helps ensure that this can happen.