There are many things you can do to make your divorce easier. Here is some advice about what not to do:
- Hiding Information– Your attorney will be your advocate through this emotional process. It is important you disclose any and all information, no matter how embarrassing or personal it may seem.
- Negative Activity on Social Media– Today we use social media to update friends and family on our daily lives, however remember to use Facebook, Twitter, Instagram wisely. Don’t post anything that may hurt your family law case.
- Showing Inappropriate Anger– As emotional as this time can be for everyone involved, keep your cool as much as possible. You have an audience watching and how you respond or react can reflect on the process
- Using the Children as a “Get Back” Tool– Remember who the innocent bystanders are during the divorce process, the children. Their world is crumbling just as yours is. Do not use them as leverage or revenge on the other party.
- Getting Advice from Family and Friends – While friends and family may mean well, they are not your attorney. Avoid following through with advise given to you by them. Every divorce is different and your attorney knows how to guide you through yours.
- Introducing a New Significant Other– While moving on and meeting new people may be good for you, remember this is still fresh for the children. It’s best to wait until time has healed some wounds and life has settled down before bringing a new significant other around the children.
- Confrontation with your Spouse– Pick good times and locations to have conversations. If you believe the topic can get heated be sure the children are not around for the conversation. Remember that you still need to communicate with your ex spouse for the children, so it’s best to work at being as amicable as possible.
- Rushing the Process– Sit back and breathe. Sometimes it’s best to just contemplate on what is happening or about to happen in your life. Ask your attorney questions, get help from professionals on how to deal with this process for you and all parties involved.
- Confiding in your Spouse– While it is good to be able to communicate with your spouse, be aware of confiding too much personal information to them. Even if you both see each other as still “”friends” during the family law process, it’s best to be respectful of each others private lives.
The process of divorce can be an emotional roller coaster ride. It can be hard to think clearly and make rational decisions. Remember you are not alone and there is professional help out there to guide you.
For a free copy of Carol Delzer’s book “Divorce Done Easier” visit Family Law Center in Sacramento.